Xiaoan Life StoriesAll guides
Language · English

Stories and guides

50 Questions to Ask Your Parents About Their Lives

Do not try to ask all fifty at once. Pick a photograph or familiar place, choose a few questions, and follow the detail your parent wants to explore.

Childhood and home

Start with places and everyday sensations.

  1. What street did you live on as a child?
  2. What did the house look like inside?
  3. What sound usually began the day?
  4. Who did you play with most often?
  5. What games did you play?
  6. Who cooked at home, and what do you remember eating?
  7. What was the first move you remember?
  8. Who looked after you most often?
  9. What did your family do on holidays?
  10. Which old photograph immediately brings back a story?

School and leaving home

If a year is unclear, record the life stage and check later.

  1. What do you remember of your first school day?
  2. Which teacher has stayed in your memory?
  3. What subject did you enjoy most?
  4. What did you usually do after school?
  5. Who encouraged you to keep studying?
  6. Did an exam or school choice change your path?
  7. Where did you first travel on your own?
  8. What did you take with you when you left home?
  9. Which school friend stayed in your life?
  10. What work did you imagine doing when you grew up?

Work and decisions

Ask what an ordinary workday was like, not only for job titles.

  1. How did you find your first job?
  2. What worried you on the first day?
  3. What did a typical day involve?
  4. Who taught you something important?
  5. What mistake changed the way you worked?
  6. Was there an opportunity you turned down?
  7. What small achievement made you proud?
  8. How did you handle conflicts between work and home?
  9. Which colleague helped you through a difficult time?
  10. Which decision now surprises you most?

Love and family

Ask permission before entering personal territory.

  1. What do you remember of meeting your partner or closest friend?
  2. Who told the best jokes at home?
  3. Who cared for you when you were ill?
  4. How did you get along with your siblings?
  5. What surprised you about becoming a parent?
  6. Which habit of an older relative would you like to keep?
  7. What saying did your family repeat?
  8. Was there a misunderstanding that was eventually resolved?
  9. Which reunion do you remember most clearly?
  10. What should your children know about someone no longer here?

Change and what remains

Repeat what you heard before pressing for emotion.

  1. What was the biggest change in your surroundings?
  2. When did everyday life begin to feel different?
  3. What helped you through difficult years?
  4. What did you understand only much later?
  5. Did you ever change your mind about someone?
  6. What can you now accept that was once painful?
  7. What small everyday thing should the next generation remember?
  8. Where would you like to go once more?
  9. Which of your own words should the book preserve?
  10. Whose perspective should we ask for next?